‘I will be waiting nearby love. You will see.’ I reached the end of the hostel where we lived and pounded on the door. My father opened the door a...d I stepped in, prepared to throw my arms around him. To this very day I will never be able to forget the look on his face. A mixture of horror and sheer disbelief twisted his visage into something I could not even recognize. He screamed. My god, my father saw me and screamed. Knowing what I do now, how could I have blamed him? His daughter was dead,. "But how?" Like a possessed man he tore across the room to his book case, there he removed a false row of six apparently thick tomes and levered up the box lid. His trembling hands withdrew the contents, a small package topped by some familiar looking gloves. He threw the gloves to one side and took the icon to his desk, there he unwrapped it and stared in horror at the two identical images."How, how? How, Mr Holmes can there be two?" William asked."Two? There are many more than two Reverend.. And so very true. He is a mean old fart. Add disgusting to that. But also disgustingly rich and hungry for a twenty four year old blonde also known as me. * Four months ago. What good is it that I throw out my mirror with the garbage when his herd is surrounded by mirrors anyway? Walls, ceiling – even floor. The only way I can avoid looking myself in my face, decaying from pain and a generous consumption of Vicodin, is to close my eyes. I live my life with closed eyes. * Two weeks ago. Hope.. Gone are the days when girls used to cook like their mothers. Now they drink like their fathers.You know that tingly little feeling you get when you really like someone? That’s common sense leaving your body.I didn’t make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row.I decided to stop calling the bathroom the “John” and renamed it the “Jim”. I feel so much better saying I went to the Jim this morning.The biggest lie I tell myself is...”I don’t need to write that down, I’ll remember it.”If.
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