The mom asks, “Why on earth do you need that?”The little boy replies, “isn’t that what you give daddy when HIS shit won’t get hard?!”This ...ompliments of Mario MComplaints to wife and replyTo My Dearest Wife,During the past year, I have attempted to make love to you 365 times. I have succeeded 36 times, which is an average of only once every 10 days. The following is a list of why I didn’t succeed more often:We will wake the kids - 54 timesIt’s too late - 15 timesI’m too tired - 42 timesIt’s too. He'd actually brought her out of a deep depression from the lack of intimate attention from her husband. Tom hadn't known it but he'd actually saved her life because Sandy had become very depressed and almost suicidal in her deep sadness.Eventually Sandy would end up having Tom's baby, a little girl, but before that happened, Sandy descended into a forbidden territory of sexual release that she never wanted anyone to know she'd taken. It happened one afternoon when Tom wasn't around and hadn't. That old Chumbawamba song kept running through my head, “I get knocked down, but I get up again. You are never gonna keep me down.” Yeah, I’d get up again, but today I wanted to sleep. It’d be nice to sleep, but roommates kept checking on me. The boys all looked so downcast, like sad puppies, that it was impossible to be mad at them. Even poor Goose, who was taking today off on account of his massive hangover, checked on me. He’d slept through the whole incident, passed out cold.When Brie. In the first couple of cases we’ll jack our prices way up – ten thousand plus evenings. If we smell a cop we make it clear the evening will be sexless and that we are not that kind of escort, but that only happened once with Edie. We still aren’t sure whether the guy was a cop, but he never came back.”“What would you do if you got caught?”“We’ve done a few lawyers in the area. I guess we’d call our favorite and see if he would be willing to help us for a freebie or something. Since we’ve stayed.
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