“Now if you`ll turn around my dear” he asked, I did.He pulled on a pair of rubber gloves and placed his fingers around my vaginal and pubic area, ...is fingers slid inside me and I felt myself go bright red with humiliation.“Are you wearing a Tampon?” he asked me.“Yes” I replied, he picked a clear plastic bag from his Doctors bag, flicked it open and asked me to remove it and place it in the bag, I couldn’t believe I was actually doing this, but I took hold of the string and pulled the Tampon. He spent the intervening decades hoping for relief and dreaming of a world where he felt safe. Most people with whom he shared his vision for a safe world, instantly and correctly diagnosed him as a serious but harmless mental case. Anyone who gave him a second thought wondered if it wasn’t bad enough that Carl needed to be institutionalized.He never had a chance in life. Being born black with an amazing artistic talent, he was the owner of an IQ in the high one-seventies that made many regret. He was so used to being the boss at work and making all of the decisions so coming home and having his wife in control was another reason why he would most likely accept being spanked again in the future.Ellen, on the other hand, was quite determined that she would use this newly established disciplinary control to change Johns attitude around the house. This, of course, was exactly what Mary had thought would happen. She told herself she must remember to thank Mary for guiding her this. It was white with hearts and butterflies all over. On thefirst page she had written "To my best girlfriend Becki". We both huggedafter I read that and I started to cry all over.Thinking back on it, I found it strange how much and how often girls cry.Boys aren't supposed to cry but I never understood why not. They havefeelings like girls but they are supposed to hide them. I loved beingable to show my emotions freely when I was with Amy.In my diary, I started to record my thoughts and feelings,.
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