In bed. I drifted into and out of sleep and then, when I looked, it was almost 8am. Now that I am home, I find it difficult to motivate myself. It's h...rd to do things in the way that I feel I ought to. Actually, it's hard to do things in the way that I have been trained to. I suppose my motivation will come back. Eventually." So, what did you do then?" I could not bear to stay in bed any longer. I got up and began to wash. I started by cleaning my teeth. I was caught by surprise at the colour. I was late for work and had to catch the next bus. I had waited only long enough to hand Dave the rent money and make sure the door would be unlocked when I came home that night. After assuring me it would be I left for work, soon casting the strange living predicament I had gotten myself into.I came ‘home’ well after midnight. It had been a long shift and I was so tired. The door was open and I eagerly closed the door to my room, stripped down to my underwear, too tired to find my pj’s in my. “Maddie, I want you. More than I’ve ever wanted anyone. But it’s more than that. It’s more than just sex for me. I love you, and I want you to be mine.”A heartbeat passed. Two. Three. I was starting to get nervous.“When did you… I mean… when did you realize you loved me?” she asked.“When you called me a dumbass,” I said with a smile. She looked at me as if I were insane. Which I was. For her. “Seriously. When you said ‘don’t just lay there, dumbass.’ The way you said it, the look on your face. I am sure about this. We have the whole night and I want to be with you more than I want anything.” He pulled back the down comforter as he said, “I was really hoping you were going to say that.” I rolled into the bed, “this is sooo comfy Matt. I can’t imagine this being any better.” Matt was taking off his shoes and socks, “I was so conflicted that day you kissed me in the pool. I felt badly for pushing you off. Then I wanted to kiss you more, that’s when I came into your locker room. When.
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